World Cerebral Palsy Day 2017

Hello my lovely readers

The keen observers amongst you may have noticed that have missed two #WordyandWheelyWednesdays posts - last week's and this week's. Sorry about that. Last week, I was zooming across the country and had very little time to think, let alone write. This week, I was on the final day of BBC Class Act, a course for actors with disabilities in which I had the honour to participate (a little more on that below). Hopefully, this post will make up for that absence, especially because I was going to write it as an extra one anyway.

Today is World Cerebral Palsy Day. It usually falls on the first Wednesday of October, which made it the first entry in my #WordyandWheelyWednesdays series, when I wrote about some of the things my CP has taught me. This year, with it being on a different day, I'm trying an alternative tack - in the spirit of some of the things I've learnt over the year since that first post.

These things, as is only apt in a post written on a blog called Wordy and Wheely for a day about Cerebral Palsy, have to do with both my body and brain. They are inspired by my efforts with my physicality (epitomised by my recent walk at Parallel London) and with my profession (the combination of my PhD and its practical application in my acting.) I wanted to write about them today because I've realised that they are essentially held together by my CP. After all, it's the reason I got into acting (and on to Class Act), it's why I'm academically and artistically invested in disability representation in the arts, and it's the impetus behind my unconventional forms of transportation and exercise. I said as much in last year's post, and even managed to state that I love my body, but I was just at the beginning of my journey towards acceptance. It took me twenty-five years, but I really feel like my twenty-sixth year has brought me further forward than I have been in a long time. This is due in no small part to me taking some big, often scary, risks - the most recent of which is Class Act.

This course, which I nearly didn't apply for, has been a hugely validating experience, and has made me realise (finally!) that I need to re-evaluate my general sense of self-esteem and in particular my ideas about my own potential as a performer. The opportunity to work with such a lovely and talented bunch of fellow actors, under the tutelage of some incredibly inspiring industry professionals, is something I will remember and treasure forever. Our disabilities were carefully considered, of course, but because of that they were not the primary focus for once. That balance is an important one to strike, and I'll be taking the lessons I've learnt over these three days forward in my acting and all other aspects of my life (not least my PhD!).

So, as I'm being brave, and also rapidly approaching my twenty-sixth birthday, I thought I'd share some elements of my list of 'Thirty Things to Do Before I'm Thirty'. Many of the items on this list are general (and a lot of you will already know about them from conversations), such as the languages I am learning and want to learn. Some, however, are more idiosyncratic - and quite specific to life with CP. I've therefore chosen four for tonight, with varying degrees of effort/planning/exiting-of-comfort-zones required to attain or complete.

• Be comfortable enough to sit in a manual wheelchair again. I absolutely love my powered chair (whose name is Bunbury, in case anyone doesn't know) because zooming around gives me so much independence. I was never particularly skilled at pushing myself in a manual, because of my left hand, so I often went in circles. That said, nifty little manual chairs make some elements of life significantly easier, even if I do need to be pushed...and I want to have that flexibility again.
• Be comfortable to enough to fly again. I suppose this is a natural follow on from the manual chair. I realise that flying is bad for the environment. This has helped assuage my sadness about not being able to do it. However, having family and friends in South Africa and Canada means that they have had to come to me, and I want to return the favour. I also miss the sunshine and the snow.
• Have at least one professional acting job. This is probably fairly self-explanatory. However, it has only officially made the list (which was unfinished) this week, because before Class Act I wasn't brave enough to put it there. Not that it wasn't an aim, I just didn't think it was realistic enough to put there solidly, despite all my training and efforts. Now I do.
• Be emotionally and physically ready for a relationship. This is the scariest and least comfortable of them all. I have dithered about including it (not on the list, but online, not least because I'm all too aware it can't be planned). Hence the very specific wording. This post is about being brave, though, and this week has been filled with reminders to break down the barriers set up - by ourselves and by society. I have plenty of barriers on this score and, whilst a fair few arise from internalising social perceptions of disability, just as many arise from myself. I know these are valid and understandable responses, but I also know that if I want a partner (which I do) I need to sort myself out. Which I am. Gradually. CP and all. Starting by getting my feet more firmly on the ground (or rather footplates).

 

Happy World CP Day 2017!